Armor:
1: defensive covering for the body; especially : covering (as of metal) used in combat
2: a quality or circumstance that affords protection
3: a protective outer layer (as of a ship, a plant or animal, or a cable)
(Websters on-line dictionary)
I have been trying on a new thought regarding my students.
It seems teaching is a constant battle of understanding. A good teacher tries to understand the students, in order to help the students understand the subject matter, and maybe the students begin to understand the teacher.
In an ongoing effort to understand my students, I think about them. I watch them. I study them. In general, I usually make their lives difficult and watch what happens. Students can be interesting and fun to observe, and sometimes enlightening.
The last few days I have been entertaining a thought new to me, and applying it to my observations.
The theory: Many teenagers use the attitude 'I don't Care' as a suit of armor against todays world. By throwing it up between their self and the world, they create a situation where (if they believe in their armor) the world can't really touch them.
It's not that they can't be physically touched.... but if insulated with a magic layer of 'I don't care' then the physical doesn't apply anymore. 'I don't care' can solve anything, if believed deeply enough.
I'm failing... I don't care.
I've been rejected... I don't care.
My folks hate me... I don't care.
I wrecked my car... I don't care.
These drugs are killing me... I don't care.
I'm wasting my life... I don't care.
They hit me... I don't care.
You can't hurt me....... because I don't care.
In watching them, and thinking, the key seems so simple.
Find the one thing they will admit to caring about, no matter how small,
and use it as a key. If not caring is the armor, then caring unlocks the armor, but only from the inside. Once the chink in the armor is found, connection can be made. Understanding can happen.
This is a thought in progress... and I'm not sure where it's going. Perhaps a tool for daily use, perhaps a part of 'The Speech' we make at the start of every year.
Feel free to comment.... prods are welcome.
4 comments:
What you said, besides being so well put, is so true.
You have to find that thing. . that one thing. I have a brother, we were adopted together and are close enough in age, we were inseparable as kids. Then our Mom got terminal cancer. In high school, I coped by diving into books. . I was reading Rand in 5th grade, and burying myself in learning and the arts. My brother went the other route. . poor grades, alcohol and probably drugs down the road. Though he was still a good kid deep inside, kind to my Dad, he was just LOST. When he was on the brink of being voted "most likely to be incarcarated" someone steered him towards his key. Technology and the sea. A "D" student in science and math, he tested off the charts at the Navy recruiting station and was one of the youngest Officers on a Nuclear Sub ever. He is now retired from a Navy career to be proud of and working in a highly respected position at Electric Boat. The kid they called a loser. . and he would have been. . lost, if not for someone like you, willing to see past the armour built to protect him from pain. And freeing him.
Me.. . I'm still a geek. :-)
I think you have the insight to see what could be the only thing important to them and use it for their good.
Is there some way to observe them, unseen, to possibly spot a clue?
Kind of an "out of classroom experience"? If they think you are not watching, they might shed the armor, briefly.
Jean... they are like squirrels.
If you don't move, and they think you aren't watching close, they forget you are there. They have no idea what patience means....
I watch them all the time, and many times they have no idea. I don't fool myself into thinking it's all the time, but often enough to pull a picture together.
"They are like squirrels".
That is priceless.
The teachers I remember best and most fondly were the ones who made us curious about the why and how of things. Real or not, their enthusiasm was contagious to not only me but a number of other very unlikely students.
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Can you work that teen armor theory into an appreciation for a car; tough on the outside but not an island, it still needs a caring and trustworthy friend to keep it healthy? I know, a reach but you said you are still stirring the pot on this idea.
Gangbanging is certainly effective armor. When I was up in Durango last year, I was coming out of a resale shop and saw three surly and 'very tough' looking young men coming up the stairs. Man, they had the 'tude down pat. I waited a second and then pulled the door open for them as they got there with a "Well, Hi!", looking them all in the eyes with a warm smile. They all broke into the sweetest, almost bashful, smiles and replies back. Armor has some interesting properties to it if you hit it just right.
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